How do I cope with a parent who seems selfish or demanding?
First ask whether this is lifelong personality or something new. If the demands feel sudden or out of character, a health change may be behind it, so mention it to their doctor.
The Alzheimer’s Association notes that mood and personality changes can be a sign of dementia. Jot down what you notice and bring the notes to your parent’s next checkup.
If this is how your parent has always been, boundaries help more than arguing. Try short, kind lines:
- “I can visit on Sundays, but not every night.”
- “I want to help. I can’t stay on the phone when you yell.”
- “Let’s make a list together, and I’ll do two things this week.”
You are allowed to protect your own health. Your local Area Agency on Aging can point you to caregiver support groups and respite. Our guide to caregiver burnout can help you plan for support and rest.
Sources
This answer is general information, not medical, legal or financial advice. Rules can vary by state.
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